Eh

-

 I am trying to be more consistent. I really need to have more consistent practices than canceling plans. My most consistent practice this week has been to not go to things after work that I planned on going to. And not applying for as many jobs as I meant to. Tomorrow I have therapy though, so maybe we can talk about that. I don't know. 

I'm also trying avoid spending all my time learning about things I hate. So, I'm very excited about The Vampire Lestat's first look. I will admit, when I finished the second season of Interview With The Vampire, I was pretty miffed about the way it felt the ending was all about making the white man, who we established as abusive, have a level of ambiguity to his actions and motivations. However, maybe I should have read the books. Maybe this was always the narrative. But then, the introduction of Louis' Blackness and Armand's Brownness were definitely added for the show. It's also been pretty well established that Louis' race-swapped representation is an excellent example of intentional representation. So, it felt like a little oversight to end the season with Armand and Louis looking so dumb and Lestat gaining some credibility and more sympathetic framing. I guess the white guy doesn't always have to be the bad guy, but he doesn't have to be redeemable either. Redeemable in the broadest "we like to give abusers a pass" sense of the word.

Still, I'm very excited to see Louis, Armand, and it seems even Claudia(!) are back next season.

Yet, devastated we have to wait until sometime in 2026 to see this next chapter. I need more to look forward to in fictional media. I've largely given up on a lot of network television because so much of it is copaganda. I don't know if there's any ethical consumption in copaganda.

And I really need to stop spending all my time on anti-capitalist, anti-AI content. Although, this is my shameless plug that if you are spending a lot of time on ChatGPT or casually use AI a lot in your day to day out of "convenience" - remember that rideshares, AirBNB, and food delivery services were initially supposed to save us time and money. They were supposed to disrupt industries in a way that was helpful to the consumer. Instead, they have allowed for discriminatory and predatory behavior to thrive. Amazon was supposed to help us. Teslas were supposed to save the planet. I say this as someone who still uses a lot of these services - I feel like AI is the one thing I can make a hard line. But, maybe it is just because it's relatively convenient for me to avoid using it.

Where I can, I guess. I'm not able to turn off the google AI responses because literally no one is allowed to do that, but I always scroll past to click on the links to relevant websites. YOU NEED TO CLICK ON THE LINKS! YOU GOTTA GIVE!

So, I think this is where we are today. It's not great, but it's something. And it's a move toward consistency and hopefully getting back to writing more regularly. We'll see.

I guess things don't need to be perfect. I wonder if I should keep letting myself use tab to autofill a word....we'll investigate this. Maybe.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

How Long Has It Been?

-
I have been very busy, I had some thoughts earlier today- I hate seeing homeless people smile. Do they know the secrets to happiness?! Why are you smiling when you're out on the streets? I imagine conventional theory would be that they are masking their troubles. I can accept this. The idea that they have found inner peace, however, is grating. Here is a paper on Louise Bourgeois while I consider turning my back on society: Louise Bourgeois Helping Hands Life is very tactile. People “feel” things. In Helping Hands, the sculpture Memorial to Jane Adams, Louise Bourgeois shows us how hands are capable of feeling in different ways. She shows us that hands connect and brings us into her perspective of human connection. In her work she bares herself. Her work reflects her identity and how her identity was formed by her interactions with others. The most intriguing part of the work for me is the complete and deliberate absence of connection to Jane Adams. Louise says she is “a h...
Read more

i don't want you

-
"This is what I give you," he says, through a grimace of pain. "I give you this when I have nothing left. I do this. These fights, they're not for me...they're for you. This does nothing for me. This does not help me. I'm doing this for you." It's a gift that cuts. It's deep and my bones are exposed to the cold so I scream in return. I lash violently. I drag weapons out of reservoirs because I'm losing. I'll never get what I want. Just this stinging evil and the look of pain that accompanies it. All I want is love but I must not know the word because every time I reach for it this happens. He tells me he gives me this- his sorrow, as though it were something I could cherish and cradle. As though it must be what I want. It's the only thing I seem capable of pulling. It's where all conversation heads. So it must be what I want. It's not just that I'm lost in a thorny hedge-maze. This was my goal all along. Pain. Forever....
Read more

Sea Change

-
I have never understood the title of that album, but I do really enjoy Beck. He seems like a nice guy. I am entirely too excited by having ten views on a post. Entirely too excited. I imagine one of my loved ones is just clicking it over and over again. I'm also pretty excited that my Twitter account has followers with little check marks next to them. It's an all around great period for my social media-ing. Mostly because I have low expectations. I am aware social media is unlikely to get me the career breaks I want. I am not sure how to get those beyond some kind of "networking," but I'll figure it out. It feels like right now is a turning point. In my recent bout of "OMG WHY?!" I took some head-space to look for a bigger sense of purpose. COMEDY! no longer seemed like a good answer, though absurdism and sarcasm will remain my primary forms of communication, so I have settled on "positive change." It's something that has been build...
Read more