Problematic

 I often start a new post immediately after the previous one because I had another topic come to mind that felt too off topic. I also end up with a lot of posts never going anywhere because I forget to come back to what I was thinking after a day of fresh thoughts. One persistent shower thought: I feel bad about only wanting to be sexual after the rituals of gender conformity. Which sounds like nothing but feels like everything. Basically, I don't think I can have sex if I haven't shaved my legs amongst other things. Yet, I've been really drawn to the idea of top surgery lately. I also follow a lot of lesbians on Instagram, but I am still pretty sure that's not who I am. Sometimes I wonder if I really am nonbinary or just don't want to shave anymore...but that feels like the most regressive joke I could make. I should take it out to the Austin comedy scene. I think comedy either comes from generational trauma or an inability to accept that because your family was ...