We'll See How It Goes

I am ensnared. Confined by a cold rain metastasizing to ice on the roads. My weather app tells me it's snowing. I imagine that is where you are- blessed by the snow. In a part of the world gifted with airy white flakes that fall gracefully like the natural lightness in your heart. A soul callously unburdened by the disastrous nature of your life and it's effect on others. Aloof and fleeting people love to dance with you, but after too long you begin to destroy life. Now that I know your new girlfriend is moving in I wonder how long it will take for you to hurt her and I wish I were able to sever myself from you completely.

There are icicles outside. I've never seen icicles in real life before. It's snowed twice in Texas this winter. I keep experiencing new things.

I started watching 9-1-1 today. It's a little too emotionally draining with no real pay-off. It's like speed-running episodes of SVU but never seeing anyone go to trial. The outcomes are rushed as are the cases so there's really no time to make a connection to anything. There's a main cast with their own issues that you get in 2 minute spots that I assume will add up to maybe an hour of story arc for each of them over the course of the season. I can't imagine this show is going to last. It almost doesn't seem worth it for Connie Britton to have left Nashville. 

On the brighter side of things I did my taxes today and it looks like I'll be getting enough money to pay off two of my credit cards. This feels like a nice start to my move-prep. I have about a month before my class starts. I haven't studied for the final I skipped, though, and I'll have to schedule that soon. I have been practicing a lot of French, but reading was thrown off in the last couple of days by trying to entertain my ex's child. I had such grand plans for the weekend and then they were completely derailed by a kid asking to hang out for an extra day. I honestly don't know why she likes me. I had a dream, though, that I would get to play with the babies in Houston. I'm actually pretty jazzed about the prospect. I love my friends more than anything else and playing with their children sounds fantastic. Buying them more things. Taking them on tiny adventures when their parents want a break. I just have to wait until the babiest baby is no longer such a baby because I don't do diapers and I don't want to learn. 

I have another half-marathon that I did nothing to prepare for coming up. It's possible I'm in worse shape than I was last year. At the very least I'm probably a little less emotionally stable...but we'll see how it goes.