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I received KitKats in the mail today. Green tea KitKats that I assume come from Japan or someone in Asia with access, or maybe it's a weird black-market system and they were smuggled in from Columbia. I can never be sure. I am assuming they are safe for consumption and hoping for the best. I feel I am not important enough to be poisoned.

Life is funny when it's not happening to you, I have decided.

A girl crying incoherently on a tile floor with one breast out is funny depending on the circumstances around it. If the girl had proven through the course of a movie to be a complete bitch and this was the moment of her comeuppance that's hilarious, in a really terrible way. If the girl spent the whole day getting rained on and this was the shit frosting on her shit cake, that can also be pretty funny. We've all had disastrous days, and taking that to an extreme can bring things into perspective and feel relatable. It's also funny in a really sad way if it's 7pm, sh…

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