Problematic

I feel bad that I hate Drew Barrymore. She seems like a perfectly nice person. I have no idea why I hold any animosity toward her.  I have been thinking for a while that I am afraid of offending people. I spend a lot of time thinking about the way I phrase things and whether my thought process is informed, compassionate, and socially conscious. I live with a lot of shame in my life and I just don't want to compound it. I also don't want to hurt anyone. I consider the jokes I laugh at carefully. I appreciate this added anxiety. I don't want to live self-righteously or anything. I think I'm probably doing the bare minimum. I'm sure that there are people and perspectives that I am missing. There are definitely opinions I'm being dismissive of and feelings I'm shrugging off. I still think I'm better off, and society is better off, trying to adhere to cancel culture. What kind of sociopath is going around unafraid of hurting other people's feelings? White

I hate myself and I want to die. I'm exhausted. I should probably be in therapy. I don't know what I would do with therapy. I've tried therapy. But maybe drugs aren't always the answer. Or maybe I'm not on enough drugs. Drugs are probably the answer. Things would probably be a lot better if I were on a lot of cocaine. It worked out for that bear. It's getting a movie now! I Googled "what to do if I don't think therapy works" because I trust Google will answer all my problems. It's a lot like drugs that way. There was a Psychology Today article, because of course there would be, and it said I should set myself up for therapy to work. Get out of abusive relationships. Eat better and exercise. Get 8 hours of sleep a night. You know- just take care of the things you might discuss in therapy before you get into therapy and you will find you feel a lot better about the progress you're making in therapy. I was pretty annoyed the moment I saw "